28 Aug Self Sabotage

In a time where the desire of the release of this long, seemingly never ending cycle of suffering remains prominent, we have found ourselves now falling victim to the forces that seek to claim us as their own in the end, whilst offering a period of the light that we have desired for so long. I, however, am now at a lost – as the echoes of all that I used to be, the echoes of all that once lay anchor on me, have now begun to spiral out of the abyss once again. 

These echoes live among the shadows, though they seem to hide from them – the reasons behind this I do not understand, but it seems this is all of some sick form of manufacturing of a mental plague so vigorous, that it seems majority of us have fallen victim. I myself, am not excused. In time, I know I will find out as to whether I’ve been right or wrong about this all along, in time I’ll find out more about this purpose that has begun to beckon within my once again, though, it remains still and quiet – as if it does not mind the quick approaching of the night that aims to take all that I am.

These shadows in essence are a calling to us all, for while they seek to devour and destroy, they also hold the power to build, and with this comes great potential. For whispers of a fire that is to be crafted have been spoken to me for so long, and time and time again, once weakened at my knees, I have felt I would never see such fire. But as I plunge myself into this Void once again, and as the feeling of dread, darker hours, and the end begin to wash over me, I float here in hopes that as all this comes to past, I will be given a final chance to build this fire once more, to witness this force that supposedly holds the absolute key to truly ending what all this has been, and beginning what I have been longing for – for oh so long. But in this state of Self Sabotage, I know when it comes to the flames – there is a lot to learn, and even more to lose.