30 Nov Within Darkness ~ Into The Noir Of The Soul

The last remaining light has faded as the dying twilight fates as I begin to twist my body in an odd and strange fashion, diving into the complete blackness that is all that remains. There is nothing left to lose and nothing left to love during this fleeting time, during these fragile hours which now count down to their final singular numbers before the arrival of the Fates that flash and blind in neon tendencies make their way in – almost like an alarm in sense, or lights on an ambulance. But what follows the arrival of these fates is of a night we have all yet to come to know, a darkness we have all felt in our bones throughout ages past, a blackness that never came to be until now. I am now journeying into the Noir of the soul, for within this darkness I have found a guidance one that could lead me to both salvation or damnation, if I do not tread carefully. What remains within the epicenter of this blackness I have yet to know, but as this inevitable night now awaits at our doorstep, I know I must now let the shadows pull me downwards, a spiraling blackness, into envisioning a void that I soon may know.

The 9th sleep has settled in, and I am now being effected by it’s waves. My eyes, growing more and more tired with each passing moment – my heart, beginning to yearn for something that my mind and soul both know it shall never have. For the line that I tread on now is shattered and tattered, it is being erased further and further with each passing moment, as soon the final hours of this Advent will be met. I have now begun to do what was once envisioned I would begin to do, I have begun to walk in the night – for now, I have run out of twilight and it has left me moving quickly within moonlight which speeds through my fingertips and passes through the shadows which still cling to me.

Upon the edge of this dying twilight which still remains hidden by this veil I have come to know as the endless gray, I now know that the flames that I hold must be the very flames that shall ignite the fires to become the last of the twilight of this Advent, a twilight that will do my bidding, a twilight that will reign fire upon all that I have once lost and all that I have once loved. This in a sense, is the first of neon fates that I have come to know, for this is simply a battle that I cannot win, and even in acceptance of this, it is eating me alive. For now, as I leave behind this dream of a truer light, this vision of finding a sense of solace and peace, this last bit of resistance towards these neon fates that are soon to settle in – I dive into what I can only describe as the inevitable, the acceptance of it all. The darkness that has long since waited to consume.