22 Aug The Void, The Sacrifice

I’ve known that my fates were being carefully selected, for the noises made during the peaking hours of the night were of frequencies that only ears such as mine could detect. I’ve known that despite my efforts, things would come warring back, like a tidal wave, more powerful, more large, and more menacing than the initial force that I would put out. I cannot pretend to know where I will end up once the night comes, nor can I pretend to be ignorant to the warning signs that are flashing to me now – telling me that time is running thin. The wars that have now begun to take place have left me with a nulled feeling from fate, a feeling that lulls me to concede, to lay my weapons down and surrender to the burning shadows at hand; but even I know deep down inside that there is enough strength to force my way through this battle.

For in some blurred yet daydream of warmth, I still picture you, an impossible fate, an impossible light; illuminating what will be a more darker night, and perhaps the darkest night I have ever known. But that’s all left of you that remains to me. Nothing but a daydream. For when I close my eyes to rest whilst the Twilight pierces through the crevices of my windows, I dream of a void so large, that even the darkest thought brings comfort to my whole. Because you became the sacrifice in all of this, the key that I was always meant to lose, yet at the same time, the lifeline I was met with during the first hours of fates, and the rise of the trials.

But now, times are beginning to change. For now, shadows fight back, pinning our backs to the ground. For now more than ever before, I have begun to look to the dangerous force of the fire that has been spoken of to me for so long, so perhaps fix this all. I however, remain skeptical that such flames would pave a way to the life that I wish to live, but I would be lying through my teeth if I were to say that desperation does not flow through my blood.  For soon, the heart that I once held, nurtured, and grown will be no more – for it will be of the Twilights and the Shadows, as a new, darker night is soon to be born. I know not why I have felt this way for so long, the anatomy of this loneliness I must come to learn, whilst the sleeplessness of these nights I have come to know. Will this all be for nothing? Or can any of this become at least something?