17 Dec XV

The remaining day’s within this dying advent have thinned greatly, as the flames that have now since turned to fires begin to burn ever so brightly – just in time to devour the end of an Advent. Deep down inside, I know that’s it’s almost over, deep down inside I know I must accept defeat, and hold surrender all the same – for while I drift further beneath within this dark pool, I know it to be the very catalyst to force these things out of me. Before the day’s of this dying Advent, I manipulated lines and tried to set into motion a future that was never meant to be mine, a future that was in reality so far out of reach, that I strayed far from the darkened path I am now on, far from the path I was always destined to tread.

This is now the only road I know, the only road left available to me, one that holds nothing but destruction and oblivion at it’s end. For no longer do I have faith in them, you, or us – as I’ve watched all of this crumble numerous times when peering into lines once hidden from me. In a sense, I suffocate in this knowledge and knowing of all these things that keep me aligned within this road now, but with only day’s remaining until the end of this all – I seek to fully accept and embrace what was meant to be from the forefront, to accept a darkness that my heart has always known was inevitable, to set a fire to my soul and all thing surrounding – knowing all to well that in the end, it will erase me.